“Our worth is not negotiated by other people”
This quote made me think about how often I make unhealthy choices when I let other people define my worth. We all want affirmation, especially from those we care about, but letting them assign our worth is a much deeper dependence and quite unhealthy. Years ago, I was devastated the first time I was ‘knocked off the pedestal’. And then my pastor kindly said, “Renée we think we don’t care what other people think of us until they don’t think good things about us.” I realized then how I was still letting other people determine my worth.
What is missing from this quote is that God is the only one that should be defining my worth and He already determined I was worth the cost of His Son. That He loves me so much, He will relentlessly pursue me. That he will ‘leave the 99’ to come find me. If God is willing to do that for me why do I let other people define my worth? If you are 100% secure in who you are in Christ and you never doubted your worth, you may be surprised that a believer like me can get tripped up by this. But maybe some of you can relate?
I think of our clients at Hope Clinic. So many times, they come to us after making choices connected to lack of worthiness. Many of our clients let the men in their lives define their worth and the value those men place on them is not very high. As a result, our clients do things that seem completely incomprehensible to someone who knows their own worth. So, one of the most important, first things we do with clients is help them see their worth. This causes their viewpoint to shift and healthy choices are so much more possible.
I pray this letter brings comfort if you needed to be reminded of your own worth. If you are firmly rooted in your worthiness please pray with me for our clients who struggle with this every day. It’s one of the most important, eternal gifts we can give our clients.